Powerhoof! Glub Glub Glub...


Um… Glub?

Another normal guy… very very normal…

image

Hail Glub.

-Barney

  1. Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

    Barney? YOU hail to this monstrosity? Qaahl shall break the earth and rip the sky, bend reality! GLUB WILL FALL! HAIL QAAHL!

    (In case you didn’t see, check the Qaahl comments.)

    Reply
    • Hail Qaahl? Hail to this pathetic bunch of tentacles? This… octopus will fall from his throne, as the Bloodsucker will reap his three hearths and consume them, while his terrifying horde flood the living world! Chz will finally sit on his throne and slowly suck life of these, who stand against him! He’s the Everlasting, the Night Prince, the Deathbinder, the Lifestealer, the Gods’s End! He’s CHZ! (But right now he’s busy watching his pathetic followers murder themselves in his name on TV, while drinking gluten-free blood)

      Reply
      • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

        Ah, yes, almighty Chz, ruler of the vampires, lord of blood, etc… And he doesn’t know how to spell. His name doesn’t even have any vowels.

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        • Lane (I like Memes)

          Please, Murkan is the best, he has KEVIN THE DESTROYER on his side, all will crumble before him.

          Reply
    • Hehe this pleases me!

      Reply
  2. Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

    Also, the more stuff you reveal, the more I want to see all the deities. It’s a dark pull, asking for more…. But you probably shouldn’t reveal all the gods.

    Buuuut if you dooooo….. You could make it an event, like the 12 days of running animations! Kinda… I dunno.

    Reply
    • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

      10* days of running animations

      Reply
      • haha yeah I did something like that leading up to the Early Access laugh- generally I like the idea but I always end up too frantic and busy to give ideas like that the time they’d really need to get going!

        Reply
  3. GlubFan69

    Oh mai gawd. Thank you. Best devs ever. I didn’t ask for the Glub picture all that long ago and it’s here within a single day. ALL HAIL GLUB! NYEHEHEHEHEHE!

    Reply
  4. GLUB GLUB GLUB HAIL GLUB GLUB GLUB

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  5. And then we saw those stone steps leading down
    Through a choked gate of graven dolomite
    To some black haven of eternal night
    Where elder signs and primal secrets frown.
    We cleared a path—but raced in mad retreat
    When from below we heard those clumping feet

    Reply
    • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

      Now, amazing poem, absolutely love it, but how exactly does this relate to Glub? I mean, the poem itself hints a crawl, with arcane symbols and “elder signs”, yet the “clumping feet” aren’t hinting towards Glub’s army of monsters. Is this… just a CRAWL thing? If it is just CRAWL, then it’s great, but I dunno if it could pass as a poem of Glub, not CRAWL. Great job though, you’re skilled, for sure.

      Reply
      • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

        *At CRAWL, not “a crawl”. Both the spelling and capitalization wrong. Who am I?

        Reply
        • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

          My mistake. I didn’t understand that it was a quote from Lovecraft.

          Reply
  6. Moot Follower

    HOW DARE YOU BEASTS LIKE QAAHL AND GLUB, Momot is our ruler and Momot is our god, he is the ruler of beasts like cats and humans alike! HOW DARE YOU NOT EVEN PUT HIM ON A TRADING CARD, HE IS THE REAL RULER

    Reply
  7. Walrusman72

    Brothers and Sisters who hail The Almighty Glub, this is a proclamation from his Arctic Prophets. The enemies of our Father of Fertility are all around us, inhabiting the cracks and corners of the Informational Ether like the filth they are. Remember the High Tenements of Glub:

    Grow Strong and Multiply.
    Crush that which opposes.

    Glub has allowed our enemies to be driven before us in battle. His dark and ancient power flows through us, swelling our strength to incredible levels. Our Thrall mastered the Oceans, and we shall master the lands. The Unholy Makers, Baer’nay and Da’viid, have smiled upon his Brininess. Our victory is assured! The Beast of The Trench has only this to say to all who oppose him:

    To the Thralls of The Mother of Insects, Teok. The weak may fear your poisons, but those who follow Glub are unfazed by your chemical trickery. Like all ants, you are a mere pest to be crushed by a swat of His Fin. The Spider is the natural prey to the Fish, such is the order of nature.

    To the Thralls of The Taker, Murkan. You cowards hide and wait, patiently expecting reward. To bad all you will be met with is the spikes of our clubs! What use is one dagger against our Dank Lord’s Teeth, whose teeth are sharper than any blade and are more numerous than the sands on the borders of his kingdom? Our traps are already baited, ready to catch you greedy pests.

    To the Thralls of The One Who Should Not Walk, Gholoth. Your prayers for The Decimation Event will soon be answered, delivered to you personally by the Tidal Unmaker Glub! He already delights himself on decaying flesh. You are mere steps away from his hideous maw, you shambling disgraces that not even the Dead wanted.

    To the Thralls of The Expired, S’hrim. Those who follow Glub are often simple, some might say stupid. However, even we understand that S’hrim’s kingdom’s are in utter ruin, his power all but wasted away to nothing. You talk of his ‘former’ power, his ‘former’ glory. The Fertile Thane will teach you all about the new age, the blood-soaked age of Glub!

    To the Thralls of The Boneless One, Qaahl. You foolish, Snake Tongued creatures shall be the first to suffer the full wrath of my Dank Lord and your Future Master. With relish I crush the brittle wings of the Beholder’s beneath my feet. With great pleasure do I gore the eyes from their bodies. With lustful force do I slaughter each and everyone of those weak, pitiful things. With pleasure I do these things, knowing I am mimicking what my Master will do to your squishy coward of a “Deity”. Clubs and Teeth shall shatter your bones, but facts will never scratch me!

    To the Thralls of The Pale King, Chz. Somehow, the Unholy Makers found a way to create creatures even more fragile than those who are aligned to Qaahl! Rightfully, you covet the strength of Glub, hoping to leech it from his veins in a merely annoying attempt at power gain. Go! Drink from his Briny Veins and see that you won’t merely be plucked off like the parasites you are to be be squashed, cast to the ground, or eaten.

    To the Thralls of The Architect of the Eternal Disease, Xophant. Just because a thing is Ageless, does not mean it can’t be killed. You’re master is old, and relies on outdated forms of destruction. He will be dashed upon the Flagstones of Existence with the rest of mortal men. His horns will be torn from his head, and mounted on the throne of Glub, a fitting trophy for the King of the Abyss.

    To the Thralls of The Rust Demon, Gor. Since the Expulse of Reality, there has lied the oceans. They are timeless, Eternal, existing even at the time of the All-Makers Inception. What good is Decay against that which lasts forever? The Leviathan of Multiplicity feeds off the corroded being of this place in order to procreate more. You believe in the lie that Corrosion and Decay will end all, but both only serve the Kingdom of Glub! Gor shall make a fine slave in his Briny Palace!

    To the Thralls of The Great Bite, Odshan. Glub remembers the Brood. Glub remembers why your God survived. Glub will not make the mistakes it’s brothers and sisters did.

    To the Thralls of The Masked One, Momot. Your beasts are nightmarish terrors that can shred a man in twain in less than a blink of an eye. Cruel, animalistic savagery is consistent with you all. You have fought agaisnt mankind and won more times than beings Glub has feasted upon. It’s a shame you’ll have no place in Glub’s kingdom, considering that you require air to breathe! Lo! Watch your horizons for the Grand Tide that will hail the coming of the Great Drowner, that will hail the end of your grip on the lands, that will hail the end of your lives!

    In closing, a Prayer to Glub (Original Words, with Translation in Astriks):

    GLUB GLUUUB GLUB GLUB
    * Within the Briny Depths *
    GLUBGLUB GLUUUUUUB
    * Lies the Grand Tide *
    GLUB GLUB GLUB GLUB GLUB
    * The Fertile Thane, A taken bride *
    GLUUUUB GLUUUB GLUB
    * Long Live Glub! *
    GLUUUUB GLUUUB GLUB
    * Long Live Glub! *
    GLUUUB GLUUB GLUUB GLUB
    * True King of the Abyss! *

    Reply
    • Hahaha 😀 things have escalated, this is the best!

      Reply
    • Art itself. It warms my slime to see a fellow worshipper of Glub among this sea of boneless scholars and beastmen.

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      • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

        Actually, there is more followers of Glub than anyone else here.

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        • (Yeah, true, i was just saying that for effect. I know we outnumber the others.)

          Reply
  8. Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

    Proclamation from the informant Addertongue, humble servant of great lord Qaahl:

    Rally, for it is a time of war! These great pages of electrical ether are charging with conflict, and battle is soon too come! Glub has rallied his armies, first made a jab to House Qaahl, but as other gods rally for him, he shows his true intentions- To take the pages and take the ancient knowledge, the Foe’rums! Other followers, this is a dark day- Glub, if allowed, will take this ancient knowledge and use it to gain secrets, dark, forbidden knowledge telling of the future!

    As we should all know, this devious plan must be halted- I do not care what deity you follow, as we all need to rally. Glub’s armies are strong, but we are stronger united! I know Qaahl’s followers don’t have a good reputation, but I do not lie!

    Each follower has something good for them, whether it be Teok’s poisons and traps, Gholoth’s skill in necromancy and strength, Murkan’s theivery, Momot’s savagery, Chz’s power, S’hrim’s dark arts, Xophant’s diseases, Gor’s acids and bloodmagics, and finally Odshan’s putrid gaze and lithomancy. Each of us may aid in quelling this rebellion! Rally!

    FOR THE FAE’RUMS!

    Reply
    • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

      Also, Barney, what have you created… well, actually.. I kinda created it, me and Walrusman… This is bad. This is very very bad.

      (Also, right now, I imagine you are grabbing popcorn for the upcoming event.)

      Reply
      • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

        Also, followers of Teok, S’hrim, and Odshan, if you’re curious, your god’s images are on Twitter. Just a follower of the great Oracle Qaahl doing what he does best, spreading good information.

        Reply
        • Hmm. Once again, hiding behind your ‘goodness’ and ‘morality’! Your weakness will not go unpunished. Assisting an enemy is a crime not even our gracious Glub can forgive.

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          • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

            Foolish thrall! Glub knows not what he does. We of the other gods will rally and knock your order from under your feet, you despicable peon of a wretched god!

          • You think the tentacled scholars have knowledge of the universe? You confuse yourself with your musings and half remembered falsities, and have no true knowledge, hiding behind the comforting notion of sanity. Glub shall soon show you how much your facts truly amount to. Nothing but dust on the wind, your master is a joke, and one that merely annoys my lord by tickling his glorious fins.

          • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

            Pah! We hide behind the notion of insanity? No, we embrace it, as the worshipers of Azathoth have done before us. You have no right to the world. We remember the great rulers, the Aboleths, that your “great king” seem to have forgotten. This is his mistake. We know your every move previous to your “great general” even thinking of it! We know your game, Bulbous one. You may see a broken cult following half-truths, but simply put (as you need it), this is only as you are not enlightened- you do not understand what we do, as your minds have rotten and your shred of sanity gone. We embrace insanity, but we do not have it- we understand it, use it. We have made a pact with S’hrim, and we truly know our god’s decree, his ancient pool of knowledge. You do not know what forces you play with, bulbous one.

          • Insanity? Hah! You do not know the depths of the ocean, where the light fades and the serpents hunt. True madness can only be glimpsed in the lightless depths, where the walls between this plane and the aberrant realm leaks, crumbles and fades. Not even a weak imitation of the noble octopi like your lord would understand the mind crushing truths that our master glimpsed, while only a deepspawn born in the darkness. Even S’hrim, in his crippling age, knows not of the truths of the mindless deep.

            The rot on our minds only sharpens it, like the fine cheeses our lord so craves, another tool to use in Glubs plan. Not unlike your lord, foolish scholar.

            The Aboleths have not been forgotten. It is long since Glub wrestled the ocean’s will from their grasp, but it remains vivid in his putrid mind. Rest assured, tentacled one, your knowledge is not yours alone. Glub has been through trials you could not begin to imagine.

          • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

            Hah! How foolish, saying the depths of insanity can only be found in the abyss. You do not know what horrors lie in the void. It is a lightless place where even stars do not dare to show their face. Your “abyss” does not compare even to the most lowly of creatures that dwell there! Your abyss may be a place where the void seeps and corrupts, but has Glub seen the void, breathed it, lived it? Less than a second there could make any man go insane. Aberrations of pure chaos, able to destroy realms, still hide in wake of the Great Old Ones. Madness is a word too weak to describe the void. No imagination man could ever think of compares to that place. Yet we, as followers of Qaahl, glimpse this place every day. Glub pales in comparison to the threats held in that byzantine prison.

          • Any man, perhaps, but our lord is no man. The humanity seized by his followers is only a means to an end, the glorious destruction or reality. You think Glub is unfamiliar to the void? Glub learned all he needed to know when he stared into the eyes of he aboleth. If the wildervoid beasts were so deadly, could they not have have defeated Glub already? Should they not have made their move, instead of hiding in their empty dimensions? No. The aboleths and aberrations pose no threat to Glub, and that was proved the day he drove them from this plane. Even should your master be able to make a deal with the mindless creatures, it would not turn the tide of war any more than your usual pitiful efforts.

  9. Seems like my Lovecraft quote summoned some sort of a fanfiction writer. This is a power I will not use with any sort of responsibility or care

    Reply
    • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

      Fanfiction writer, not. I write sure, but barely ever write fanfiction (that word disgusts me, it’s drawn too much negative connotation over the years.). I’m sorry I mistook that.

      Reply
      • Addertongue (Jamais Namme or Xoac103)

        The quote was rather poetic, and I assumed as much.

        Reply

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